All packed up and no place to go

So packing is really not fun. We still have to pack the office, and "take apart" our back bedroom. And the garage and laundry. And our bed is really cool, but really big- and it needs to come apart to get down the stairs. So we still have to do that too.

The roof repairs were done yesterday. We're not even getting an entirely new roof and it's still, like $2500. Unbelievable. And the guys drink Busch. And are creepy. There's a lot of hammering/banging. Can they go now?

I'm trying to keep myself going, energetically. All of this just drains your energy. Packing does it on it's own, but add the mental stress to that and you're wiped out by like 3pm on a weekend day. So I'm back to being completely addicted to caffeine...which is fine- I'll just deal with it when we get to NC.

The idea of us leaving behind our family pretty much makes me sick to my stomach. There's going to be tears....and separation issues. But I really don't have much of a choice. This is the next step in our journey, and it's always for a reason.

Only 2 days left of work and we're super-busy with RFPs. I wish we weren't so I could slack off a bit for my last 2 days. But I have to give them all I've got. They'll be a person down come Wednesday. I already started taking picture frames down at my desk. It was a little awkward.

PA is where I've "belonged" for the past 23 years. Now, I have to pick everything up and move it to NC. And be jobless. And find a new place to "belong". I'm really outgoing, but I hate meeting new people. You know they're casting their "first impressions". And they're trying to get a read on how "nice" you are and how you may fit into their lives (or not). It makes me nervous being judged in such a way, as I try to find the positives in all people I meet. And I "want" them all to be my friends. And I understand that this is my own way of judgment. I just feel that perhaps my way is a little....softer.

I can't wait to do my taxes.
We have a wish list, debts, and I'm not working.
The debts and not working aren't very fun.....so the following is our wish list, for your reading pleasure:

• Kitchen cart islandy thing (we have no island, but a very large kitchen).
• New TVs for our bedroom and the living room.
• King size bed, as Ranger takes up way too much space and my back has been hurting.
• New couch, since ours was broken by a friend of ours. Story: Ian worked with a guy who was also a bouncer at a club in Allentown. He came to our apartment one night and sat in the middle of the couch. The couch is only supported by the ends and there was no support in the center. Therefore, it's frame broke in half and now is supported by books. Because I like it. And we havent had money to get a new one. And I like it. And it was only $200.
• Another dog: Ranger needs a buddy. Perhaps it will stop him from trying to play with the cats. We plan on getting a rescue, of course. No puppy mill products.
  
• Saving for our trip (family reunion) to Sedona AZ this summer. I'm excited. Plus, we'll be able to catch up with family.
  
• New patio set for the back porch. Our other one stayed with the current house and was cruddy. And a grill for that matter, same deal. And a fire bowl.
• Proper comfy video-game-playing, movie-watching furniture for the family room/man area. The new house has upped the classiness level and the futons have got to go.
• Sanity.
• North Carolina friends.

My nose will not stop running. We have to go to the laundromat this morning. My best friend Casey, my mom and my dad are coming to NC with us to unpack the truck. So I need clean bedding for all of them. And everything I own is covered in dog and/or cat hair.

Then, Lauren and Brad (Brad is my cousin) are coming to the Valley and we're going to lunch. (They live in the Hatfield area.)

And then more packing.

Tonight we're joining Kyle and Christen for Office Space because Christen has never seen it and thats just ridiculous. And it gives us a reason to sit around. And see Office Space. Again. :)

So I appreciate everyone reading my blog. My thoughts are just coming out of my head and I'm just typing. No rhyme or reason, and I know it jumps around a lot. But thats how all of this has been and I'm not a good writer.

I had a terrible dream last night. So therefore, I'm awake and Ian is not.

I'm a little scared of the newness. Change is difficult, but very healthy. Everyone has been really supportive. Lisa at work has "relocated" before from Ohio to PA. She explained it this way: "One day you'll wake up and it'll all be done." Her words pretty much have been keeping me going. This has been the longest 2 weeks of my life.

I need a job. I'm really worried about this. And the economy is the main culprit. I'm very sure of myself and my abilities. But if there isn't an opportunity to share them with anyone, I can't get a job. I guess it all works itself out.

Okay enough rambling. Ciao.